Exercise & Stress Relief: Why Just 20 Minutes Feels So Good

youre only one workout away from a good moodHave you ever wondered why you feel so good after taking a walk or riding a bike? Exercise has so many benefits, including the fact that it provides natural stress relief.

I’ve always tried to make time to exercise a few times a week. I consider it very important to my physical and emotional health. This morning I was on call and had to go in for an emergency appendectomy. When I left the hospital I headed straight for the gym. And as luck would have it, I happened to be in time for a Zumba class 🙂 Continue reading “Exercise & Stress Relief: Why Just 20 Minutes Feels So Good”

How to Bring Good Energy Into Your Home Today

You are responsible for the energy you bring into your homeDid you know that the people around you can sense your energy? This happens mostly on a subconscious level. But it affects how people relate to you and feel about you.

You are responsible for the energy you bring into your home.

That is one of those things that everyone seems to get on a certain level, but no one really knows HOW to do it. Today I’ll show you 🙂 Continue reading “How to Bring Good Energy Into Your Home Today”

Doing The Work Step-by-Step for Emotional Wellness

the only time we suffer is when we believe a thought that argues with what isIf you’ve ever suffered from anxiety or depression, you know how wonderful it feels to finally have relief.  As someone who’s battled anxiety for decades, emotional wellness is always a top priority of mine. When I am in the grip of anxiety, life is a nightmare.  And when I am well, the whole world is fine.

One of the ways I keep myself feeling at peace and emotionally healthy is to do The Work– this is where you inquire about the habitual negative thoughts you have by asking yourself 4 simple questions. When you unravel your thoughts, you begin to see that the opposite of what you feel is usually true or truer than the thoughts you were believing. Continue reading “Doing The Work Step-by-Step for Emotional Wellness”

My quest for a peaceful weekend

THINK acronym think before you speak

I used to wonder why my weekends were always so bad. Why my husband and I always picked fights and got so bitchy with each other.  I got so sick and tired of dreading my weekends and wishing I could just relax and enjoy 2 days of rest and not working.

What I am beginning to learn is to keep the focus on myself, not others, and not on things out of my control. As Byron Katie says, there are only 3 businesses in the world: God’s business, Other Peoples’ business, and Your Business. Whose business are you in? 🙂 Continue reading “My quest for a peaceful weekend”

The Secrets to Stopping Negative Thinking That No Therapist Will Ever Tell You

you are not your mind

One of the reasons I love to listen to my Eckhart Tolle audio CDs so much is that he helps me understand that I am not my mind… I am not my thinking mind, I am the silent watcher behind it. What a blessed relief to realize this!

My thinking mind is what keeps me fearful, and being trapped in it is torture. Not understanding that I can learn to stop “listening in” to the nonstop mental chatter is the reason I have had so much mental suffering in my life. This is not only true for me but for all mankind.

Although some people feel their suffering acutely, as I have, many are only aware of it as a pervasive feeling of low level irritation, short-temperedness, or a feeling of lack or incompleteness.

I have had a lot of anxiety in my life, so learning to break free from the prison of the thinking mind has been a real joy for me… Continue reading “The Secrets to Stopping Negative Thinking That No Therapist Will Ever Tell You”

You can’t be happy if you trash talk yourself

be careful how you talk to yourself because you are listening

When I was a little girl I used to keep a diary. Every year at Christmas I would get a brand new One Year Diary – a pretty little book with a lock on it and a little key. I filled up those little books year after year, from about 4th grade till high school.

I found a these old diaries a few years ago and was more shocked than amused reading them- I really didn’t think much of myself, the pages were filled with all sorts of negative self talk.

I was really jealous of my best friend Allison, and used to make a lot of cartoons. In those little cartoons, Allison was popular and pretty and well-liked. I drew myself like a big goon, all awkward, tall, lanky and ugly. It’s funny but it’s really not. I called myself Stupid, Fat, and Ugly, and had all my illustrations to prove it. Comparing myself to Allison and other girls I thought were better than me was a running theme in my diaries.

If I thought that little of myself when I was 10, 11 and 12, is it any wonder I grew up with low self esteem issues?

Sometime in my early 30s my friend Marjory lent me a book called Healing the Child Within . We did some work on this issue, and it was pretty helpful to me at the time. I learned to tune into my inner dialogue and notice how I talked to myself. I remember listening in for the first time on how I talked to myself, and most of the time it wasn’t great. The words used were often R-rated versions of Stupid, Fat, and Ugly, and a lot more descriptive.

It’s been a practice of mine for at least 10 years now to catch myself when I slip back into self name-calling and try to replace it with something kind and loving.

Today I really try to guard my mind and refuse to think badly of myself. I know that negative self talk makes me feel like crap. I try to apply the same loving kindness towards myself as I do to my family, friends, and animals.

I would never talk to my son or my mother or a friend  the way that I have spoken to myself through the years, that’s for sure.

I was taught as a child in Catholic school to put myself last and today I reject that. As Sister Mary Joseph used to say (yell)“If you want JOY in your life, put Jesus first, Others second, and Yourself last!” This was a grown woman who used to threaten, shame and hit us kids on the regular, and I used to believe everything she said! 😛

If you engage in negative self talk, you lose. It’s bad for you, your self-esteem, your health, and the people you love.

Today I know that having respect and kindness towards myself and making my well-being a priority is an important part of having a happy and balanced life. It is not indulgent or selfish, all due respect to those old nuns…

I hope you will pay attention to your inner dialogue and notice if you aren’t your own worst enemy, like I used to be. If you notice yourself talking smack about yourself, stop it! Instead of negative self talk, try being soothing, supportive, and kind. Be on your own side. Work with yourself, not against yourself.


Lisa Arcelia

when you think about yourself use the most loving and nurturing words

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Need Stress Relief? Here are 10 Mindful Tips to Lighten Your Burden

feeling stressed mindfulness tips

I had so much fun on the earlier post I did about tips to relieve stress, I decided to do another one today.

Got stress? See if you can use one or more of these simple mindfulness tips today.  Don’t worry, none of these tips are difficult, and all are aimed to help you feel better fast 😉  When you fill your mind with positivity & goodness, your outlook tends to get brighter, and your day can really lighten up.

It can be especially helpful to use these suggestions when you feel agitated, over-stressed, or overwhelmed. So let’s get going! 😉 Ok then, without further ado, here are… Continue reading “Need Stress Relief? Here are 10 Mindful Tips to Lighten Your Burden”

Doing the Work to Get Rid of Emotional Pain

who is more hurtful

Last summer I went to a retreat to see Byron Katie, one of my all time favorite spiritual teachers, to learn all about The Work, which is her simple method to investigate stressful thoughts and get out of emotional pain. I first heard about Byron Katie years ago on Oprah’s Soul Series TV show.

According to Katie, all stressful thoughts are untrue, and by doing The Work on your own stressful thoughts, you can free yourself from the egoic thinking that she says is the cause of all the suffering you and I experience. This is a gentle way out of emotional pain and suffering and into wellness and peace.

Katie is the author of Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life . This book takes you step by step into the process of The Work. It shows you to use the Work to set yourself free from emotional pain and suffering by questioning your own stressful thoughts. It requires that you write your thoughts down, as this is the only way to stop the Ego. (I have a journal by my bedside and I also do the Work on my computer.) Continue reading “Doing the Work to Get Rid of Emotional Pain”

7 Super Easy Tips to Reduce Stress and Have a Great Day Today

how to beat stress

I work full time, run a home business on the side, and have a family that I need to feed and water occasionally, lol 🙂  Like you I have a full plate, and keeping myself balanced & my stress level in check is paramount to feeling good and staying healthy.

I have discovered some simple practices that really yield big results. These practices also build on themselves, and I have found one of the best ways to reduce stress during my busy work week is to follow these simple mindfulness practices. They put me in the best possible position to start any day, no matter how crazy the day may get🙂

So to help you stay balanced in your busy life, and without further ado, here are 7 super easy ways to mindfully reduce stress and have a great day: Continue reading “7 Super Easy Tips to Reduce Stress and Have a Great Day Today”

Not so different


The ego likes to emphasize the ‘otherness’ of others. – Eckhart Tolle

When I think about this statement, which is pretty profound, I can see how this has affected me my whole life. When I am in my big Ego, I fall for the trap that others are so different from me. That this one has little in common with me, that this other person has so much in common with me.

When I deem someone has little in common with me, I separate myself from them and automatically judge them. I never did this consciously or with malice, but this has been how I lived all my life. I judge someone and see them as either above me or below me in some way. Both of these judgments leave me isolated and disconnected, and I must play the role. And when I play a role, I am not being authentically me. Continue reading “Not so different”